Sweet, Dark and Crazy

Thursday, January 28, 2010

I Need a Man

I need a man. And, I don’t need one because I’m horny. As long as there is free Internet porn, I’ll be okay. But, I need a man for other reasons. I need a man because I’m sick and tired of doing EVERYTHING my damn self.

Earlier this week, I was running low on oil. I can’t afford an oil change right now (Yes, I am that broke) but thanks to my dad, I know you have to keep oil in the car. So what did I do. I checked my oil level, realized I needed a quart, bought one and put it in my car. Over the years, I’ve also jumped batteries, changed flat tires and dealt with overheating in a car. What can I say, I think dad wanted a boy.

Two days later, I’m in the bathroom and I see what appears to be a bug on the wall. I take it off the wall and flush it. Only to find that the damn bug gnawed a HOLE in the friggin’ drywall. So I ran out into the garage, grabbed the Home Defense Insecticide and sprayed the shit out of the holes, then, in a female McGyver move, I used some cotton balls to close the holes.

At this time I wasn’t sure what kind of bug it was so I went to Home Depot to find out and get stuff to caulk the holes the damn bugs left. So I came home and caulked. Only today, I find two more holes and found a termite in the sink. I’ll be calling termite control businesses in the morning.

I need a man. And I need a man who knows something about cars and houses and all that crap because I’m tired of doing all this by myself. At this point, it would be romantic to have someone that could caulk for me or just kill a couple of bugs. Yes, that would be really nice.

Labels: Men

posted by SDC @ 9:24 PM

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