Sweet, Dark and Crazy

Monday, May 23, 2011

The Rapture? Or Not.

So, here it is Monday, May 23, 2011. I'm here typing this and more importantly, my sainted Aunt B is still here, so it is safe to assume that the rapture didn't happen.

Yet me and my friend Keri weren't so sure on Saturday. As we talked, my low battery light blinked furiously.

We talked about the Rapture.

SDC: So, I guess there still is a chance that the Rapture might happen. I mean the day isn't over yet.
Keri: I think it was supposed to happen at 6:00. What time is it now?
SDC: It's after 6:00. Of course, it's possible that Jesus is working off of Central, Mountain or even Pacific time.
Keri: True. I guess it's kind of presumptious to assume he'd be on Eastern time or any American time for that matter. He could be on Israeli time for all we know!
SDC: Isn't it after 6:00 there too?
Keri: Hell, if I know. Oops, guess that should have been heck if I know.
SDC: Yeah, if it happens today it would suck because that would mean that I spent half of my final day of earth teaching a class! On a Saturday no less! At several times during the class, the students worked my nerves so bad that I had to turn to the white board and mutter Sweet Jesus!

And then my phone went dead.

Of course, I knew the phone was dead because the battery had just died. Poor Keri had no idea what had happened only that this was the day the Rapture was supposed to take place and I'd just exclaimed "Sweet Jesus!" before the line went dead!

I put the cell on my charger and called Keri back on the home line. For a minute, just a minute, she thought that it could have, maybe, just possibly have been the Rapture.

Anyway between the two of us, we still couldn't be sure. Yes, we are Christians. Yes, we believe. However, we've seen the Left Behind movies and it's possible that both of us could have been left behind.

I decided to put this issue to bed once and for all. So I called my Aunt B. If there is anyone I know that would be raptured away, it would be Aunt B. Well, she picked up the phone and any possibily that we'd missed out on the Rapture was instantly dismissed.

So Keri and I went out for dinner and drinks ... after all, Jesus's first miracle was turning water into wine!!!

Labels: Family, People Please

posted by SDC @ 3:17 PM 0 comments

About Me

Name: SDC
Home: United States
About Me: I'm a youthful 44-year old, who is infectiously funny, dangerously smart, wildly creative, hopelessly math-phobic, tactfully honest, occasionally politically incorrect, and cute to boot!
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